Hand in hand

Grumble

Oof. I'm looking into two--all of two--grad schools and already I feel overwhelmed. "Take the Praxis II test," one of them says. "No, take the WEST-E test," the other says. "The Praxis II is being fazed out." Well, which one do I take, people? "Oh, and by the way, that will be $200 for you to sit down for a few hours and scribble some answers on a piece of paper."

Peachy. Just peachy.

All I really want to do is think about Europe. Going there, that is. It might happen this September/October. I'm trying not to get my hopes up, but it's hard. The thought of seeing Prague, Paris, Rome, and all those other places that have been tantalizing me for years gives me chills.

I want to think about grad school too. I mean, I wouldn't be applying if I weren't excited about the idea. It's just that decisions--important, huge ones--are needing to happen, all within the next few weeks and months, and I'm slightly panicked. No, make that terrified. So, at this point, despite looking forward to grad school, despite being genuinely interested in becoming an elementary school teacher, all I really want to do is escape to Europe.

My kiddos!

I visited my 1st and 2nd graders yesterday... well, now many of them are 3rd graders, but that's beside the point. I walked into the room, and thirteen adorable heads turned around to see who was there. A few of their jaws dropped, and I heard someone say "she looks so different". Then they left their chairs and swarmed around me, asking if I remembered their names. Fortunately, I remembered most of them, except poor little Maddie. The thing is, I know her name, but in that moment I completely blanked. I felt so bad.

And then... Abel started pushing his way through the sea of kids, saying "watch out, coming through" and when he reached me he threw his chubby arms around my waist and hung on me--yes, hung--for a good thirty seconds. He hasn't changed a bit, I thought, as I struggled to keep from keeling over.

In those moments, I felt so content. I don't think I stopped smiling the entire time. After I'd patted enough backs, recited enough names, and received enough hugs, Tiffany suggested that I read to them for a while. That was always my responsibility last summer: I love to read and inflect my voice dramatically to keep the kids entertained. I joyfully agreed and perched on the stool at the front of the classroom. She handed me a book called Hatchet, and I read two chapters from it. A rather boring book, but the kids seemed to like it well enough. Only Abel and Cameron--and occasionally Cienna and Maddie--whispered to each other off and on, but otherwise everyone listened. Sooo different from last year. Last year, I swear they all had ADHD. :)

I left after only a half-hour, but I was thoroughly rejuvenated and ready to tackle this grad school/elementary ed thing I'm currently pursuing.